As a Christian Single, I #DateDifferently

Two conversations with two different friends – one a man, the other a woman – held at two different times but were about the same topic. They both wanted to talk to me (of all people) about dating and the future and singlehood and the one and “How will we know?”

My answer was the same to all of the questions. “I have no clue.” In one case, I may have gotten even a little nervous and jumpy and asked, “Wait…what? You want to ask me my thoughts on dating? Really? Are you sure?”

Part of the reason I become uncomfortable talking about dating is I look at it completely differently than I did in the past. In total transparency, I look at it completely differently than a lot of my friends. My Christian friends.

It’s hard to navigate the world of dating in our over-sexualized, want-it-now, digital society.

When I become transparent about my thoughts on dating and think about the mistakes I’ve made in the past when it comes to dating, I realize that many of the single people I know are approaching dating through the societal lenses colored by movies and fairy tales.

In order for us to get different results, we have to have a different approach. Different actions require different thoughts.

Even when it feels like everyone we know is sleeping together, doing everything but sleeping together, living together, Netflix and chilling, and hooking up because it’s cuffing season.

Today traditional dating has become “outdated,” yet men and women still seek meaningful relationships. People are frustrated in love, but struggling with exactly how to connect in today’s virtual world.

Enter The Dating Project.

The Dating Project is a new non-fiction film from executive producer Steve McEveety (The Passion of the Christ, Braveheart), produced by Paulist Productions, Mpower Pictures and Family Theater Productions that follows five single people ages 18-40 as they navigate beyond the hookup culture to traditional dating. Professor Kerry Cronin from Boston College is featured throughout as she teaches and encourages her students to return to traditional dating. There is no script. There are no actors. These are real people trying to find love and happiness in an age of swiping left or right.

Y’all, I have seen a sneak peek of this movie and can say it is worth seeing. If you’re single, you’ll not only feel understood, but you will also be able to relate to many of the real people in this documentary.You may even commit to doing things differently in your own dating life.